


The Moving Castle

by academy_x



Category: The Adventure Zone (Podcast)
Genre: Gen, Howl's Moving Castle AU
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-12-19
Updated: 2016-12-23
Packaged: 2018-09-09 22:11:04
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,644
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8914864
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/academy_x/pseuds/academy_x
Summary: Lucretia Hatter has resigned herself to a life of working in her family's hat shop, but when a witch curses her to age to an old woman, she packs her bags and leaves without so much as a goodbye. She forces her way into the wizard Taako's moving castle, claiming to be the new housekeeper.--Lucretia is Sophie, Taako is Howl, Angus is Michael





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> unlike the book with howl and sophie this has absolutely no romantic stuff between lucretia and taako (of course)

Lucretia Hatter has resigned herself to a life of mundanity. She is the oldest of three and not destined for adventure, unlike her youngest sibling who has already been shipped off to be apprenticed under a witch. When her stepmother dies, she will take over the family hat shop, but for now she is content to simply work in it. Lucretia enjoys working on the hats, imagining what their owners will look like, what sort of woman who can handle purple feathers and a wide brim. She likes it especially in the evening when the shop has emptied out. She sits by the candlelight, sewing, and talks to the hats, predicting their futures. The one she is working on now is plain and brown. She gives it a big cream ribbon, that will catch the eyes of a wealthy gentleman.

Caught up in her work, she doesn't hear the door rattle. First when the bell announces that someone has entered the shop, does Lucretia look up. She is half-expecting her stepmother, back already from her dinner party, and wondering why she hasn't taken the back door, but the woman entering the shop is a stranger. She is tall and elegant, almost glittering, like she doesn't quite exist in the same plane of existence as everything else. Lucretia jolts to attention, wincing at the sound of her chair scraping against the wooden floor.

“I'm looking for a hat.” The stranger announces.

Lucretia knows there are no hats in the shop fine enough for the woman. The stranger knows it too. Still she fetches box after box of hats, and the stranger discards every one of them after seconds of consideration. Lucretia sneaks glances at the stranger, trying to figure out who she is. There is something unnatural about her teeth, sharp and almost too white. She doesn't recognize the face, and she knows most of the upperclass of Rockport. She can't help thinking that there's more behind the woman's late visit, and she is desperately trying to remember if she had locked the door. She must have forgotten. How else could the stranger have gotten in?

The stranger tosses another hat aside and stops Lucretia when she goes to fetch a new. She grasps Lucretia's shoulders and starts mumbling in a strange language Lucretia doesn't understand. She assumes it's magical because of the electricity in the air, the goosebumps running down her back. Lucretia's vision blur, and she can feel her flesh shifting. She wants to tear herself away from the stranger, _the witch_ , but all her strength has left her. Her heart pounds faster and faster.

The witch lets go, and Lucretia staggers. The world is spinning out of focus. She steadies herself against the wall, trying to control her breathing. In one of the shop's many mirrors, meant for customers trying on their hats, she catches a glimpse of herself. Lucretia is old. She is ancient. She moves up a hand to touch the hair that used to be her pride and joy. Gone are the shiny, dark locks, replaced with grey and wiry strands of hair. She gasps. The witch laughs gleefully at her shock.

“Take a good look. This is your life now. Perhaps you will think a little before insulting someone another time.” The witch says.

Lucretia is terrified, but more than that she is angry. She opens her mouth to speak, to ask why this was done to her, but she is unable to utter a single word. She tries again and again, growing angrier at every failed attempt. She glares daggers at the witch.

“Oh, you can't talk about your curse. At all. Nice little touch, isn't it? That will certainly make it that much more impossible to break.” The witch says. Then she exits the shop and disappears into the night.

Lucretia doesn't remain still for very long. She cleans up after herself, closing the shop up for the night, then fights her way up the stairs to her room, lighting her way with a candle. The hand holding it is shaking. She is fuming. She doesn't know the woman who cursed her, has never met her before, and it seems obvious that there has been some mistake. This only makes her angrier. Her mind is icy. One thing is very clear to Lucretia. Her family will not see her like this.

She packs her things, an extra dress, some underwear and socks, a deck of worn playing cards and a couple of other worthless trinkets. Looking at her belongings, she feels almost ashamed. There's so few things, and none of them matter. She fetches the old, dusty suitcase from on top of the closet. She has to stand on her tiptoes to reach it, and her joints protest. Old age as shrunken her. Everything fits easily in the suitcase, rattling as she carries it downstairs. At least it isn't very heavy.

Lucretia takes a last look at everything, pausing in the kitchen. Here she finds a loaf of bread, some cheese and two apples. She wraps them in cloth and stuffs the bundle in the suitcase. Then she writes a quick note. It isn't particularly good, but she can't think of a better lie. Gone to seek my fortune, it says, in her neat handwriting. In a way it's true.

 

* * *

 

The hills are heavy with morning fog, and she hears the castle before she sees it. The earth shakes every time it takes a step. It is only partly visible, a smoking monstrosity of metal and wood. Lucretia inspects the castle, curious. Her legs are already moving her towards it, before her brain catches up. She looks back one last time, catching a glance of her home town, just waking up. Then she runs as fast as her old legs can carry her, towards the moving castle.

Briefly she wonders if it's smart, after all there is only one man that it could belong to. Taako. A great wizard with a less than great reputation. Supposedly he eats the hearts of young ladies. Lucretia has always believed those tales to be lies and superstition. Besides, even if it true, she is hardly a young lady anymore.

Lucretia catches up with the castle. On its back and to the left, there is a small terrace and a door leading inside. Next to it is one of the giant metal legs that carries the castle. She hesitates. It would be foolish to have come this far only to die, squished beneath a leg. Lucretia draws a shuddering breath and tries to attune herself to the movements of the castle. She feels terribly silly and is suddenly very glad no one is around. She can't imagine how she looks, skin flushed with sweat and her hair flying everywhere. She has the rhythm figured out now. She grasps her suitcase tighter and runs.

Lucretia leaps. She slams into the door. It swings open, and she tumbles inside, falling to the floor. She lies there, heaving for air, and tries not to think about what would have happened if the door had been locked. Slowly, Lucretia gets up and looks around.

The room is almost too much to take in at once. There are shelves from floor to ceiling, filled to the brim with books and jars of colorful powder and flasks filled with murky liquid and instruments she doesn't know what does. A staircase leads up, deeper into the castle, and clothes hang over its railing. There's a big fireplace, with ash strewn in front of it, and when Lucretia looks at the flames, she swears she sees purple and green mixing with the normal orange fire. Most of the space in the big room is taken up by a huge oak dining table. At least she assumes it's oak. The entire tabletop is covered in piles and piles of books and dirty dishes and food and even more clothes. All the chairs surrounding it are also covered with stuff, and none of them match each other. Everything seems a little broken and old. She fits right in.

Then the boy wakes up. Lucretia doesn't notice him at first. He was sleeping in a chair, behind the mess of a table, using an open book as a pillow. He looks to be about ten and wearing a fancy, if dusty, deep blue suit. The boy fumbles with his glasses, pushing them up his nose. He points a finger accusingly at her.

“Who are you? How did you get in here?” The boy asks.

“This is Taako the Wizard's castle, right? What's your name?” Lucretia interrupts him, before he can fire off another question.

“I'm Ang–! I mean that's none of your business. Besides I'm not supposed to talk to strangers. What are you doing here?” He asks.

“I'm the new housekeeper.” Lucretia lies.

“Taako would never hire someone without telling me first.” The boy says.

“So this is his castle!” Lucretia says.

“Do you know any other moving castles? You don't have to be a detective to figure that one out.” The boy says.

He's right, and she is torn between laughing and feeling a little insulted. No ten-year old should sound that smug. He reminds Lucretia of herself at that age. Maybe she needs to try a different tactic. She wants to stay after all, and winning the boy over would be a good first step.

“My name is Lucretia.” She says.

“I'm Angus. But that's all I'm telling you! And don't get too comfortable. When Taako comes home, he's kicking you out.” Angus says.

Lucretia smiles at him and doesn't answer. She finds an unoccupied chair and pulls it to the fireplace. The fire warms her stiff joints, and she yawns. Her instinct is to fight to stay awake, but she ignores it. She's been up half the night, and one of the joys of being old is to sleep whenever you want. She'll get up in a couple of hours, maybe see about making her and Angus some breakfast and straighten up the place. She was improvising when she said she was the new housekeeper, but the place desperately needs cleaning.

Angus seems to have accepted her presence for now and is pointedly ignoring her. He's eating an apple and reading in the thick book he had slept on. Lucretia wonders if he's Taako's apprentice, and if so how that happened. She pushes the urge to ask away. There'll be time to ask questions later. For now she leans back in her chair and let sleep take her.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> taako shows up

Two days pass without Taako showing up. Lucretia spends them doing some light cleaning, but mostly she is exploring. Whoever built the castle, Taako she assumes, had little understanding of architecture or logic. It's both fascinating and horrifying. One narrow staircase leads up to a door that opens into nothing, a straight drop down the exterior of the castle. One window shows a flowery meadow, another overlooks the ocean.

That night Lucretia sits by the fireplace. Like everything else it isn't normal. It's occupied by a demon, of sorts, who supposedly powers the whole castle. Lucretia doesn't think the creature looks particularly demonic, but appearances can be deceiving. Just look at her. She's sent Angus to bed, so it's quiet. Not that the boy makes much noise. And this is when the wizard returns home.

Taako throws the door open and strides in, walking more on the air than the floor. His checkered cape billows around him, and he is wearing pointy shoes. His whole being is screaming ta-dah!, Lucretia thinks. Taako looks around a bit, but doesn't seem to notice her. He sags a little, disappointed perhaps that no one was there to witness his entrance.

“Ango?” Taako calls out.

“He's in bed. Do you have any idea of the hour?” Lucretia says.

“We wizards don't concern ourselves with matters like time. Who are you?” Taako says and to his credit, he doesn't seem fazed at all to find a stranger in his home.

“The new housekeeper.” Lucretia says.

The more she says it, the more she likes it. It's not a bad career. No worse than owning a hat shop certainly. Lucretia doesn't have much time to consider this, before Taako interrupts her train of thought.

“Now hold up, Angus would never hire a housekeeper without telling me.” Taako says.

“I sort of hired myself.” Lucretia says.

“You pay your own salary, too?” Taako asks, then chuckles at his own wit.

“I'll work for just the room and board. And I'll need Sundays off.” Lucretia answers.

“Seems acceptable. Now what exactly does a housekeeper do?” Taako asks.

“Well, I could make you a cup of tea?” Lucretia says.

“Delightful.” Taako says, clapping his hands.

Lucretia fetches water and the kettle. She stares very intently at the flames and tells the demon inside not to try anything funny, before setting the kettle down to boil. It took some time getting used to a cooking fire you had to bully into working, and Lucretia stills feels self-conscious about talking to it. Especially in company. If Taako notices, he doesn't say anything. He is busy levitating the plushiest armchair Lucretia has ever seen. The chair floats down in front of the fireplace. Taako sinks into the deep red cushions and sighs contentedly.

While Lucretia prepares the tea, she sneaks glances at Taako. He's young with brown skin and white blonde hair. As he takes off his wizardly hat, she notices his roots showing. They're dark brown, which makes sense. No one has that shiny hair naturally. Taako catches her looking, once, but he just smiles at her and stares back. Lucretia holds his gaze. He has dark eyes, with darker circles underneath. Lucretia has to fight the urge to tell him to go to bed, that he needs more sleep.

Taako pours tea for the both of them in cups that don't match their saucers. It's still too hot to drink, so Lucretia cradles the cup in front of her, breathing in the hot fragrance. Taako takes a sip. Apparently wizards don't concern themselves with matters of temperature either. Lucretia tests hers carefully, wincing as it burns her tongue a little.

“So you're really a wizard?” Lucretia says.

Taako raises his eyebrows and replies with silence.

“Perhaps you can-!” Lucretia begins, but words fail her as she tries to explain everything.

“I can what?” Taako asks.

Lucretia tries again, but nothing but infuriating silence comes out. She swears instead. Taako laughs.

“I'll just assume you wanted to say perhaps you can talk about how great a wizard you are, Taako, but that some curse prevents it.” Taako says.

Lucretia laughs. Taako is ridiculous, but he isn't all bad. And he enjoys a nice cup of tea.

Apparently Taako was serious about talking about himself because he begins spinning a tale of that time he dueled a guy on the top of a moving train. Lucretia gets the feeling he's embellishing, or maybe just straight up lying, but she doesn't care. He follows up with a story about fighting a giant spider or possibly a man named Spider. Lucretia isn't sure. Her mind isn't quite as focused as usual, and her eyelids keep dropping. Taako yawns, and it's infectious. He keeps talking, less adventure and more a general overview of his talents.

“Well, as you can see, I'm pretty much an expert on most things, magic. Curses too. A witch kissed me once, you see, and cursed… but that hardly matters.” Taako says.

Lucretia is tired, but she still manages to pick up on the odd note of seriousness in Taako's voice. She frowns. Taako doesn't say anymore though. Shortly afterwards he excuses himself and flies up the stairs, presumably to his room, behind the only locked door in the castle.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> whoops i almost ended another chapter by having lucretia fall asleep in front of the fire haha also im not sure who gets to be the fire demon (calcifer in the book) i was thinking maybe klaahrg?

**Author's Note:**

> not a 100 percent sure if i will continue this but i have some more ideas most importantly that magnus shows up as that guy that got turned into a dog


End file.
